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I’ll put some new shoes on…

July 26, 2009

My vanilla life is pretty drab. Vanilla me is pretty ansty and anxious and just blech most of the time. For anyone who sees me at the clubs knows that these words don’t particularly describe Evey. Evey is giggly and exhuberent. She is vivacious and is always up for a good time, unless she’s floaty and then she just doesn’t know what’s going on. Usually when I’m around my kink people this side of me just floats to the surface. However, after a long day at work (usually fridays after two back-to-back 10 hour days) sometimes she needs a bit of a push to come out. This is where I’ve developed a trigger to bring out more of the Evey in me: my clothes.

Perhaps it’s silly, but there’s something about my Pink and Black and Glitter and Stillettos that just get me giddy. I have a fetish for Fashion.

This last weekend at Thunder I was one of the voluenteers on the Talent Show and we had to be in our tennis shoes and staff shirts until it was over. I hadn’t realized how bad I’ve gotten until I was sitting telling one of the girls on the crew with me how anxious I was to go put on my pink corset and new black thigh high boots. After the show, I didn’t even make it to the room I was going to change it.. instead I opted for the bathroom just across the hall from the facilites we had held the show in. LOL. It had been a good 6 months since I’ve not been dressed in fetish clothes by 7pm on a Saturday night!

On a deeper level, I feel that lately I’ve put on a new pair of shoes in my life.  I’ve found myself making more choices for myself in my vanilla life, my kink life, my relationships.. etc. I’m not soaring or anything yet, just getting my feet off the ground. I’m probably not even doing the best job at it, I’ve been relying on other people to lift me up for years that I’m not surprised I’m fumbling a bit… I just wish the reaction didn’t have to hurt other people. But it’s okay, because ultimately I think this new pair are beautiful and things WILL be okay eventually… just need to time to readjust everything.

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